Johnny's little sister 'Little Sally' came home from school with a
smile on her face, and told her mother.
'Frankie Brown showed me his willy today in the playground!' Before the
mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, 'it
reminded me of a peanut.'
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked. 'Really small, was
it?'
Sally replied, 'No.....salty.'
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
The Prem Season
Crystal Palace 0 Barnsley 1
Neil Redfearn returned to haunt Crystal Palace with the goal that gave Barnsley the first Premiership win in their 110-year history.
The midfielder has waited more than a decade to savour life at the top, watching his old team-mates bob in and out of the elite three times since he departed for Watford in 1988.
But his superb 56th minute drive wrecked their hopes of leading the English first division for the first time since they were tagged the 'Team of the 80s' under Terry Venables in September 1979.
And it gave Danny Wilson's gritty Tykes renewed confidence for the awesome challenge they face this season, much-needed after their debut defeat at home to West Ham on Saturday.
No wonder his players embraced each other in emotional scenes on the final whistle.
Skipper Redfearn, who arrived at Oakwell via Oldham for 150,000 in 1991, was the major force behind their promotion with 17 goals.
And he was inspired to take advantage when John Hendrie dispossessed a dozy Simon Rodger, taking up the ball and angling inside from the right.
There still seemed little danger when he swung his left boot from 25 yards, but he caught new goalkeeper Kevin Miller by surprise, his shot dipping inside the top right-hand corner.
It was a shocker for Palace and their new star, Attilio Lombardo, especially after their impressive win at Everton, but though Bruce Dyer cracked a shot against the bar in the 78th minute, they could not recover.
In truth, though both newly-promoted sides have spent around ?4million each on reinforcements, their football still smacks of the Nationwide and both will surely be lucky to stay clear of relegation.
Lombardo was an immediate hit with the home fans on his home debut, though Yorkshire grit soon dented the veneer of sophistication he brings to Steve Coppell's side.
And the Londoners' other big name signing, striker Paul Warhurst, was replaced after 68 ineffective minutes.
If it had not been for Miller, a ?1million signing from Watford, Palace would have succumbed more easily to the wily 36-year-old Hendrie.
If there is one side who should not give Wilson's men an inferiority complex this season, it is Palace, who finished four places below them in division one last season and only graduated via the play-offs.
They took a 1-1 draw from Selhurst on their way to automatic promotion and though record signing Macedonian Georgi Hristov is still not considered fit enough for a full debut, they more than matched the home side.
Lombardo, the ?1.6million signing from Juventus, showed nice touches, as one would expect for a player of his pedigree, but he will need time to find a mutual wavelength with mainly journeymen colleagues.
His passing was exquisite at times, though not always anticipated by histeam-mates, and one wonders how long he will keep running so hard to demonstrate he is not here just for the money.
Barnsley, for sure, will run like whippets all year to protect their new-found status and were denied a 30th minute lead by the remarkable athleticism of Miller.
Hendrie should never been allowed to make so much progress, twisting and turning David Tuttle and Marc Edworthy, before cracking a shot which looped up off a defender's boot, wrong-footing Miller. But he managed to spring backwards and hook the ball off the line.
Three minutes later Dean Gordon burst on to a rebound to get clear on theleft side of the area and drilled the ball low across the face of goal, where both Lombardo and Warhurst lunged without connecting.
Almost immediately at the other end Hendrie planted a cross on to the head of the unmarked Darren Barnard, who brought another fine save from Miller.
Then Hendrie sent Miller low to his right to hold a crisp shot before thewhistle gave both teams a welcome chance to rehydrate.
Dyer showed great strength to win a running tussle with Arjan de Zeeuw and get clear on the right-hand side of the Barnsley box in the 50th minute, but Watson blocked the shot at the base of his near post.
A minute later the Barnsley goalkeeper had an amazing escape, parrying Dyer's close-range shot at the feet of Kevin Muscat, who somehow hoisted the ball over the gaping goal from six yards.
The home fans appealed in vain for a penalty when Lombardo was dumped onhis backside by Dutchman de Zeeuw.
Barnsley were rocking, yet within minutes they were celebrating and then England Under-21 goalkeeper Watson set about protecting their precious goal.
Lombardo set up Rodger with a quick chance to atone, but his cracking shot was saved by Watson with his legs.
Substitute Neil Shipperley got clear on the left, but ignored the calls of better-placed colleagues to try and chip the goalkeeper, and his effort wafted beyond the far angle.
Dyer then burst through to crack his drive against the underside of the bar, Lombardo appealing that it had crossed the line on its way down before being cleared behind.
Watson made sure of the three points in the final seconds, flicking over Dyer's downward header from the most awkward angle.
Teams
Crystal Palace: Miller, Edworthy, Gordon, Roberts, Tuttle, Linighan, Lombardo, Warhurst, Dyer, Rodger, Muscat.
Subs: Shipperley, Veart, Nash, Hreidarsson, Fullarton.
Barnsley: Watson, Eaden, Appleby, Sheridan, Moses, De Zeeuw, Hendrie, Redfearn, Wilkinson, Bullock, Barnard.
Subs: Leese, Marcelle, Liddell, Bosancic, Hristov.
Referee: N Barry (Scunthorpe)
Neil Redfearn returned to haunt Crystal Palace with the goal that gave Barnsley the first Premiership win in their 110-year history.
The midfielder has waited more than a decade to savour life at the top, watching his old team-mates bob in and out of the elite three times since he departed for Watford in 1988.
But his superb 56th minute drive wrecked their hopes of leading the English first division for the first time since they were tagged the 'Team of the 80s' under Terry Venables in September 1979.
And it gave Danny Wilson's gritty Tykes renewed confidence for the awesome challenge they face this season, much-needed after their debut defeat at home to West Ham on Saturday.
No wonder his players embraced each other in emotional scenes on the final whistle.
Skipper Redfearn, who arrived at Oakwell via Oldham for 150,000 in 1991, was the major force behind their promotion with 17 goals.
And he was inspired to take advantage when John Hendrie dispossessed a dozy Simon Rodger, taking up the ball and angling inside from the right.
There still seemed little danger when he swung his left boot from 25 yards, but he caught new goalkeeper Kevin Miller by surprise, his shot dipping inside the top right-hand corner.
It was a shocker for Palace and their new star, Attilio Lombardo, especially after their impressive win at Everton, but though Bruce Dyer cracked a shot against the bar in the 78th minute, they could not recover.
In truth, though both newly-promoted sides have spent around ?4million each on reinforcements, their football still smacks of the Nationwide and both will surely be lucky to stay clear of relegation.
Lombardo was an immediate hit with the home fans on his home debut, though Yorkshire grit soon dented the veneer of sophistication he brings to Steve Coppell's side.
And the Londoners' other big name signing, striker Paul Warhurst, was replaced after 68 ineffective minutes.
If it had not been for Miller, a ?1million signing from Watford, Palace would have succumbed more easily to the wily 36-year-old Hendrie.
If there is one side who should not give Wilson's men an inferiority complex this season, it is Palace, who finished four places below them in division one last season and only graduated via the play-offs.
They took a 1-1 draw from Selhurst on their way to automatic promotion and though record signing Macedonian Georgi Hristov is still not considered fit enough for a full debut, they more than matched the home side.
Lombardo, the ?1.6million signing from Juventus, showed nice touches, as one would expect for a player of his pedigree, but he will need time to find a mutual wavelength with mainly journeymen colleagues.
His passing was exquisite at times, though not always anticipated by histeam-mates, and one wonders how long he will keep running so hard to demonstrate he is not here just for the money.
Barnsley, for sure, will run like whippets all year to protect their new-found status and were denied a 30th minute lead by the remarkable athleticism of Miller.
Hendrie should never been allowed to make so much progress, twisting and turning David Tuttle and Marc Edworthy, before cracking a shot which looped up off a defender's boot, wrong-footing Miller. But he managed to spring backwards and hook the ball off the line.
Three minutes later Dean Gordon burst on to a rebound to get clear on theleft side of the area and drilled the ball low across the face of goal, where both Lombardo and Warhurst lunged without connecting.
Almost immediately at the other end Hendrie planted a cross on to the head of the unmarked Darren Barnard, who brought another fine save from Miller.
Then Hendrie sent Miller low to his right to hold a crisp shot before thewhistle gave both teams a welcome chance to rehydrate.
Dyer showed great strength to win a running tussle with Arjan de Zeeuw and get clear on the right-hand side of the Barnsley box in the 50th minute, but Watson blocked the shot at the base of his near post.
A minute later the Barnsley goalkeeper had an amazing escape, parrying Dyer's close-range shot at the feet of Kevin Muscat, who somehow hoisted the ball over the gaping goal from six yards.
The home fans appealed in vain for a penalty when Lombardo was dumped onhis backside by Dutchman de Zeeuw.
Barnsley were rocking, yet within minutes they were celebrating and then England Under-21 goalkeeper Watson set about protecting their precious goal.
Lombardo set up Rodger with a quick chance to atone, but his cracking shot was saved by Watson with his legs.
Substitute Neil Shipperley got clear on the left, but ignored the calls of better-placed colleagues to try and chip the goalkeeper, and his effort wafted beyond the far angle.
Dyer then burst through to crack his drive against the underside of the bar, Lombardo appealing that it had crossed the line on its way down before being cleared behind.
Watson made sure of the three points in the final seconds, flicking over Dyer's downward header from the most awkward angle.
Teams
Crystal Palace: Miller, Edworthy, Gordon, Roberts, Tuttle, Linighan, Lombardo, Warhurst, Dyer, Rodger, Muscat.
Subs: Shipperley, Veart, Nash, Hreidarsson, Fullarton.
Barnsley: Watson, Eaden, Appleby, Sheridan, Moses, De Zeeuw, Hendrie, Redfearn, Wilkinson, Bullock, Barnard.
Subs: Leese, Marcelle, Liddell, Bosancic, Hristov.
Referee: N Barry (Scunthorpe)
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